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But, a man unable to get laid is one who wields little power in the sexual economy.He’s been outbid for sex by his more valuable male opponents.On describing Elliot Rodgers, feminist commentators were quick to rightfully criticize his sense of entitlement to sex and male entitlement more broadly. But now, vicariously at least, the adult virgin male finds himself lambasted from two fronts.
Quite naturally, the adult virgin male internalizes these viewpoints and feels a profound sense of shame.
Countless threads with comparably sombre titles litter Forever Alone – a subreddit where virginal males come to vent their frustration, lament their lack of intimacy with women and seek solace in their shared experience of loneliness.
Yet, where the misogynistic Rodgers displaced his ire onto innocent people around him, other adult virgin males turn inwards on themselves.
Again, to adopt the psychological lingo, he may feel a sense of It is this perceived lack of contingency between one’s actions and their ability to have sex that leads many adult virgin males to define themselves as “involuntarily celibate” or “Incel.” Never having had sex is not the most depressing issue, per se.
Rather, it’s the continued inability to access sex when one wants it. Surely no one, man or woman, is entitled to sate the desire to have sex, whenever one wants, however one wants and with whomever one wants?Several are quick to pin their prolonged virginity on immutable factors such as looks, height, or the apparent pickiness of women.